


Been Awhile

by organfailure



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: (not really tho), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Don't Ask, Drinking, Erwin and Armin are big nerds and i write about it and cry, Erwin being unnecessarily angsty, Implied Sexual Content, Levi's Good Advice, M/M, One Night Stands, except not really because come on even i have standards, half of the events that take place in this i just plagiarised from my own life, jean/eren mention, seriously please don't read into the star wars references, sexe times ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), spoilers for the first lord of the rings movie i guess???????
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 03:37:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13138260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/organfailure/pseuds/organfailure
Summary: Erwin had almost forgotten how casual social interactions outside of polite conversation with his colleagues worked, and his circle of friends was, quite frankly, limited to the same people that had been in it for nearly a decade. It was nice, he supposed. Actually conversing with someone new.The sex had been good too, of course.





	Been Awhile

It was decidedly out of fashion, Erwin thought, locking up his car after Levi had hopped out to head up towards the bungalow.

Crashing house parties held by college-aged kids he barely, nay, didn't know was something Erwin would've done when he was in, well, college.

He didn't know the host, and he didn't think Levi did either: Levi was cousins with someone who was friends with a guy who was friends with the owner of the bungalow....or something like that.

Levi only half-explained his tenuous connection to whoever's house this was, and Erwin had only half-listened anyways. Who cared whose party it was, anyways? Erwin needed to get out of the house after enduring a seemingly never-ending cycle of going to work, coming home, watching House of Cards on Netflix, and occasionally drinking with Levi, Hanji, or whichever of his admittedly few friends was available.

  
The bungalow itself was actually rather disgusting. Erwin was now more curious as to whose party this was now, and why Levi was willing to come to a place so far below his preferred level of cleanliness. Levi was anal about such things, and the house looked a little grungy even to Erwin, who had never been overly picky or conscientious about it as Levi was.

Dirty looking panel siding of some sickly greenish-orangish-brownish color, brick colored shutters, and a front porch that looked like it hadn't been swept since the bungalow was first built. A small and equally dirty plastic orange Jack-o-Lantern smiled up at them, despite it only being late summer, welcoming them into its abode with a chipped black smile. An enormous orange cat slept contentedly on a creaky rocking chair next to the door, before which lay a dusty welcome mat. 'WELCOME: I HOPE YOU BROUGHT WINE' the thing declared, and Erwin spotted a brown stain covering the lower half of it that he decided he didn't want to know the origins of.

The muffled hip hop music blaring into the air from the inside grew louder and focused as Levi opened the door, letting him and Erwin in before someone could come let them in.

  
"Don't get lost." Levi grumbled, barely audible over the cacophony of the party. There was a sizeable crowd gathered in the living room, which was significantly cleaner that the outside of the house would suggest, although the scent of cigarette smoke did permeate everything. Erwin immediately noted everyone at this party was younger than him: College-aged or just graduated, at least. Two girls drunkenly sang along to the song that was blaring out of the loudspeakers, a song that Erwin couldn't even tell had words. A guy in a snapback dozed on the couch. Erwin was definitely out of his element.

Levi didn't stop to observe the goings-on around him, leading Erwin into a slightly less crowded kitchen where a group of kids were stood near a cooler filled (hopefully) with some kind of alcoholic beverages, fishing potato chips out of a big plastic Christmas bowl and bobbing along to the music. Levi wordlessly pushed past one, fishing two bottles of Corona out of the cooler and handing one to Erwin. Levi then continued to lead Erwin out of the kitchen and into a small backyard.

Still more people milled about out here, some sitting, some standing, some drinking, some not, and most everyone smoking. Two boys were unfolding a large Ping Pong table (beer pong, perhaps?) while a disinterested-looking girl held a stack of red Solo cups (definitely beer pong, then) nearby. Without sparing a glance or a word of explanation for Erwin, Levi immediately made his way towards the girl, leaning into her for that awkward half-hug-shoulder-pat thing only siblings or other close relations could perform.

  
"Mikasa, how are you."

  
"Well, thanks. Good to see you."

  
The girl, Mikasa, spoke with the same cool detachment Levi did. Definitely related. That must be the cousin Levi had mentioned.

  
"This is Erwin." Levi said, gesturing vaguely towards him. "He's kind of boring and doesn't get out much, so I brought him here."

  
"Thanks." Erwin said dryly at the moment Mikasa asked, "Why would you bring him here, this party sucks."

  
"We can't be picky, we don't get invited to many parties."

  
"You weren't invited to _this_ party."

  
"We were kind of invited. Were you invited?"

"Yeah." Mikasa handed off the Solo cups to one of the boys setting up the game of beer pong, a boy even shorter than Levi with close cropped hair and the biggest joint Erwin had ever seen in his life balanced between his lips. "Whatever. We're playing beer pong if you want in on that."

"Hard pass. I don't know where that alcohol or those cups have been."

"Fine." Mikasa said with a slight eye roll, although she didn't seem surprised. She eyed Erwin next. "How 'bout you?"

"I think I'll stick with this for now." Erwin said, raising his bottle. "Maybe later."

Mikasa turned away from them without another word, apparently helping the shorter boy with filling up the cups as the other boy switched places with her, clapping Levi on the back with much more mirth than Mikasa had.

"Hey, didn't think you'd be coming! Not exactly your scene, is it?"

  
"No, not really. Didn't have anything better to do, though." Levi said coolly, taking a sip of his beer. The boy was taller than Levi (Not that that was really saying much) with messy brown hair and, judging by the slight flush to his cheeks, was already inebriated. How many of these college-aged friends did Levi have that Erwin didn't know about?

"Who's your friend?" The boy said, sparing a glance over to Erwin.

"Erwin. We go way back."

"Nice to meet you." The boy said, firmly gripping Erwin's hand and shaking it vigorously. "Eren Jaeger."

"Nice to meet you." Erwin said cordially.

"You guys greet the birthday boy yet?"

"I don't know the birthday boy. You?" Levi asked, removing Eren's arm from his shoulder. Eren didn't seem to notice.

"No. I don't know him either." Eren admitted cheerfully. "We've got some mutual friends though."

"Mm. Say, that boyfriend of yours isn't coming, is he?"

At that, Eren's face took on an even redder hue, this time not from alcohol.

"Uh...you know, he's not really my boyfriend...He's just this guy I'm around a lot..."

"Yeah...a lot..."

"Hey-"

"Yeah, sure, whatever. He's not here, then?"

"No..."

"Too bad. I liked him. He reminds me of me." Levi took another sip, humming into the bottle.

Eren chuckled at that. "That sounds exactly like something he would say." He craned his neck to look behind him; Mikasa and the other boy had just finished filling up each cup with some sort of pale lager, and a group of people had gathered around the table, ready to play.

"Well, I'm gonna go join the game. You guys wanna play?"

Erwin and Levi both shook their heads, to which Eren immediately pouted.

"C'mon, Levi, you can't just come to a party and just sit in the corner."

"I can, I have, and I will. It's a lot more fun to watch other people get drunk than to get drunk when you're my age. Besides, I have to make sure Erwin doesn't get lost."

"I can take care of myself." Erwin said at the same time Eren insisted Levi wasn't going to join simply because he 'knew Eren would throttle him'. Levi seemed more interested in what Eren was saying anyways. Oh well.

"You're not going to goad me into playing your stupid drinking game. Besides, we all know I handle my alcohol better than you and everybody else at this party."

"Prove it."

"No."

An unstoppable force met an immovable object. Erwin decided he had seen enough and, figuring by the looks of it, neither Eren nor Levi would be budging anytime soon. Erwin used to be good at assimilating into other people's friend groups: Inconspicuously blending in with the conversation until the people he was talking to forgot he was a total stranger. Maybe he was still good at it, and testing out his party-mingling abilities was, at the moment, more entertaining than watching Eren and Levi bicker.

Back in the kitchen (Erwin glanced over his shoulder as he re-entered, and, of course, Levi hadn't even noticed him leave), the other partygoers had clustered up into small groups, one near the entrance to the living room, one by the fridge, and another by the drinks table. The trick was to find a physical opening within a group, stand there, and let your God-given charm and wit (Erwin liked to think he was at least somewhat charming and witty) do the work. Problem was, the groups were tightly knit and offered little space for Erwin to worm his way in and make some new, temporary friends. This would be harder than he thought.

Erwin surveyed the room once more, sipping his Corona and sizing up the landscape. A boy wandered in from the living room and refilled his plastic cup with the suspicious, reddish-brown liquid that filled up the punch bowl just as two other boys stampeded in behind him, one chasing after the other.

In a single cataclysmic second, one boy slammed into the boy who had been innocently refilling his drink, collateral damage in whatever chase or fight had suddenly spread to the kitchen. The larger boys barreled out of the kitchen with as much speed and ferocity as they had entered it, spilling out into the backyard to spread havoc to the outside of the house.

"Assholes!" The third boy shouted after them, disgustedly flinging liquid off his hands. Oh dear: The poor thing's shirt was now drenched in mystery alcohol. The boy sneered maliciously in the direction of the backyard before setting down his cup down, glaring down angrily at his drenched shirt.

"Need some help?" Erwin stepped forward from his position as bystander at the edge of the kitchen. The boy's head snapped up as Erwin stepped towards him, face somewhat flushed in what Erwin assumed was embarrassment.

"No! I'm, I'm fine, I can take..." After a moment, the boy's glare fell into an expression of resignation as he nodded.

"Actually, yeah, some help would be great."

"Do you know where a bathroom is?"

 

\---

 

The bathroom was small and not much cleaner than the rest of the house, but it offered a working sink and some privacy. Erwin could have easily made some dumb joke about being in such an enclosed space with a boy currently stripping his shirt off, but decided it would be wise to avoid doing so. The boy was still pretty miffed about the spill, after all, shaking his hair out carelessly as he peeled the shirt off.

  
"Cold water for alcohol stains." Erwin mumbled, plugging the sink up and filling it with as cold of water as could be drawn from the taps. "But some stain remover couldn't hurt either, if you've got any."

  
The boy nodded, turning his shirt out and placing it into the cold water.  
"Thanks." He murmured, running over the t-shirt's printed design with his fingertips as water seeped into it. "Tonight just, ah, hasn't been my night I guess." He said with a chuckle.

"Bad night, then?"

"Nah, just kinda been in a weird mood today. Thought going to this party might pull me out of it, but..." The boy trailed off. "Well, thanks again, anyways."

"You got a name?"

"Course I got a name."

"Can I hear it?"

The boy smiled, rather slyly, Erwin thought, and he looked him over once more, doing his best to not linger on his naked torso. Short, lithe body. Tanned skin dotted with the occasional freckle. Pale blond hair reaching just past slender shoulders.

"I'm Armin."

"Erwin."

"Nice to meet you, Erwin."

"Nice to meet you, Armin."

Following the short exchange, the two stood together in the small bathroom, gazing at each other in way that Erwin wasn't sure was comfortable or uncomfortable. Contrasting to the cacophony of the party right outside the door, it felt almost tranquil.

"You like The Clash, huh?" Erwin broke both the silence and his gaze, glancing at the shirt currently soaking in a stranger's sink. "I thought I recognized the print."

"Hm? Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm into them." The boy nodded a little awkwardly, lips pursed. "I mean, I do like them, but the shirt's actually my friend's. I'm more of a David Bowie kind of guy, anyways." He added with a nervous chuckle.

"Really?" Erwin flashed a grin despite himself. "Nice. Favorite album?"

"I mean, nothing can really beat Ziggy Stardust, can it?”

"A man after my own heart, truly." Erwin said, earning another smile from Armin. Remembering their location in the cramped bathroom, he suggested, "We could continue this discussion elsewhere, if you wanted."

Armin seemed to turn the thought over in his head for a bit, big blue eyes studying Erwin's face and teeth worrying his lower lip.

"Well, you see, I'm kind of out of a shirt at the moment."

"Have you got a jacket?"

"Yeah, but it's in the hall closet."

"I could fetch it for you."

"If you would be so kind." Armin ventured a sweet, somewhat apologetic smile as Erwin maneuvered past him towards the bathroom door. "It's kind of plain looking, dark gray and thin. It should have some cherry chapstick in the pocket, if that helps you."

"Plain, gray, chapstick, you got it." Erwin ducked out of the bathroom, carefully stepping around the clusters of partygoers of varying levels of sobriety in the hall to get to the closet, feeling around for the hoodie that matched Armin's criteria, eventually coming across a worn out, baggy hoodie with a chapstick tube indeed in the pocket. Erwin slipped it off the hanger and surreptitiously headed back towards the bathroom, avoiding the curious and vaguely judgemental stares of one couple. Back in the bathroom, Armin was looking a little cold, goosebumps just barely appearing across his skin.

"Thanks." He said gratefully, taking the jacket and wrapping it around him. "Ah, that's better."

"Shall we move to the living room, then? We're getting some odd looks staying cooped up in here."

"I can imagine." Armin agreed, already stepping out into the hall.

\---

"I'm just saying, the original script wasn't exactly amazing."

"The script was perfectly fine, thank you very much."

"I mean, the whole 'Kessel Run-Parsec' business always bugged me-"

"Oh my god, if you were even at all familiar with the world of Star Wars you would know that there's a proper explanation for-"

"For what? Parsecs being a unit of distance and not time? Is the official explanation that Han is an idiot? Or Luke is an idiot for believing him? Or they're all idiots?"

"The proper explanation actually involves the relativistic distances in hyperspace and a pilot's maneuvering abilities-"

For a moment, just a moment (and maybe a few more), Erwin just shut up and sat back. It felt good, letting his brain shut up and listen to someone else mindlessly. It especially felt good when it was an attractive blond lecturing him passionately on black holes and the Millennium Falcon's superior navigational computers, or whatever explanation Armin was currently feeding him. Maybe it was the romantically dim lighting of the living room the two found themselves in, or maybe it was the pleasant buzz the alcohol had running through his body. Armin's eyes were pretty. Big, blue, bright. Was he wearing mascara? There was no way his eyelashes were naturally that dark, especially with hair that light. Erwin was probably just looking too hard.

"Are you listening? Hey. Hey."

"That's stupid." Erwin said resolutely. "Sounds like a half-baked excuse for a plot hole to me."

"Ugh, you just don't get it."

"You care too much about Star Wars."

"I've been told that before." Armin's smile was wry in one second, bashful the next as he shifted in his place on the couch next to Erwin.

They couldn't have been talking for more than an hour; Levi popped in at one point to use the restroom, having apparently been roped into whatever drinking game was going on in the backyard, checked in on Erwin momentarily, and went on his way after raising a quizzical eyebrow to the younger male curled up on the sofa next to his friend. Levi would do well to stay in his lane, Erwin thought.

Either way, when he had wandered into some stranger's bungalow searching for a way to idly spend his time on a Saturday night, he hadn't been expecting to meet someone he actually enjoyed (Enjoyed quite a bit, in fact). Just his luck Armin would be victim of some rambunctious college boys, just his luck he was there to slide in and help out. That did remind him, though, that they should probably retrieve Armin's shirt at some point. For now, it could wait.

"I'm not talking too much, am I?"

Erwin vehemently shook his head. "Absolutely not. I like listening to you, even if you are, objectively, wrong."

"Ha, ha. Star Wars is good, not my fault you wanna live in dark. Besides, I bet you say that to all the boys."

At that, their conversation suddenly took on a different intent, the mood dropping into something else, something warmer and more enigmatic. Something that felt not quite like flirtation, but certainly teasing at it. Erwin noticed the shift immediately. He wondered if Armin did too, if that was his intent all along. Maybe this night would end even more differently than he had planned.

"Only the pretty ones." Erwin responded, not quite willing to throw himself head over heels in those unfamiliar if inviting waters. It had been a long, long time since he had last don this. No harm in getting his feet wet, though. Armin relaxed a little further into the couch cushion, gazing deeply at Erwin and Erwin gazing deeply back. They stayed like that a moment, neither saying anything or venturing anything. The song, some R&B jam, transitioned into one more familiar to Erwin, the deep rumbling bassline and smooth electric piano shooting straight into Erwin's soul.

"I love this song." He murmured, not looking away from Armin.

"I don't know this song." Armin said quietly in response.

"Wanna dance?"

Armin's eyebrows raised up quickly, evidently surprised, though he didn't seem taken aback, just...thoughtful. Searching. Erwin could practically see the gears in his head turning behind his eyes.

"Sure. Why not."

A few other couples had opted to begin dancing a little earlier as the party track switched from upbeat hip-hop to the more downplayed slow jams playing now, so they certainly wouldn't look out of place (Erwin didn't exactly like the idea of Levi gleefully spying on him). The two made their way to a little spot in the living room dance floor, and Erwin tentatively raised his arm up next to Armin's side.

"May I?" Armin nodded, and Erwin gently placed his hand on a place on Armin's hip he deemed respectable. Armin, a little shyly, placed one (oh so delicate) hand on Erwin's shoulder and linked the other with Erwin's. With that, the two began to sway, a little awkwardly at first but growing more natural as they gained their footing.

"What song is this, again?" Armin asked, leaning his face closer to Erwin's in an almost intimate gesture.

"'Don't Let Me Down,'".

"Like that nasty EDM song?"

"What?"

"Nevermind."

Erwin's grip on Armin's waist became a little surer as the song's smooth rhythm relaxed the both of them, and Armin gravitated a little closer to Erwin, bodies nearly touching as they moved together.

"I like it." Armin murmured, still holding onto Erwin even as the song ended and transitioned to another soft R&B song. Armin hummed along to it, quietly, absentmindedly, as Erwin's hand rested a little lower on his waist.

"Know this song?"

"Mm-hm."

"It's pretty."

They continued to dance, neither saying anything, and eventually that song ended as well. To Erwin's disappointment, Armin pulled away from him, stepping out of his grasp and unlinking their hands. Armin pursed his lips in thought as his eyes moved between Erwin's face and some arbitrary point away from him. C'mon, Erwin reasoned with the universe, we were getting along, we had some chemistry going, you don't need to end this so soon, it’s been so long.  
Armin's eyes met his again, surer, this time, and Erwin mentally prepared himself for whatever awkward excuse Armin would have to tell him.

"Um…Thanks for helping me out, again. And, you know, talking with me. It was nice hanging out with you."

"Pleasure's all mine."

He waited for Armin to tell him he had to get going, or link up with his other friends, or anything else. Instead, Armin reached up on his tiptoes to press a gentle, chaste kiss to his cheek. Erwin's eyes closed and he sighed in contentment as Armin pulled away. When Armin didn't say anything else, or do anything else, Erwin's eyes opened again. Armin looked as though he was waiting for Erwin to respond before he began to turn away.

"Uh, sorry. I kinda-"

Armin's voice caught as Erwin reached a hand out to cradle Armin's cheek, ducking his head down to press a proper kiss to Armin's lips. Armin hummed happily, immediately reciprocating as he reached up to wrap his hand around Erwin's nape. The kiss was short, both men acutely aware of the party still going on around them, but going on his pleasantly pink cheeks and the hand still on Erwin's neck, Erwin guessed Armin didn't want to stop kissing anymore than he did.

"I hope this isn't presumptuous of me," Erwin murmured low, just for Armin to hear, "But do you wanna get out of here?"

Armin smirked, eyes glittering with a hint of mischief.

"What about your friend?"

"Oh, he can get his own ride home."

"What about my shirt?"

"You can probably take it out now. Unless you'd rather stay-"

"Lemme text my friend." Armin interrupted, whipping his phone out of his pocket with an endearing sense of urgency. He again placed his hand in Erwin's leading him to the bathroom as he texted out a quick message with his free hand. “Let’s go, then.”

\---

 

Armin was hot under his hands by the time they stumbled through Erwin's front door, clinging and clutching and kissing. They had barely crossed the threshold of Erwin's bedroom when Erwin's hand snaked under Armin's shirt and none too gently grabbed him closer, fingernails scraping roughly against Armin's back as he pulled him close. Armin gasped, smiled, and nuzzled into the crook of Erwin's neck, and suddenly, Erwin felt like a teenager again.

"Do you really want to do this?" Erwin asked, breath hitching as Armin's teeth lightly nipped at his skin.

"Don't ask stupid questions." Armin huffed, placing his hands on Erwin's biceps and running his fingers appreciatively across the clothed muscles. Erwin ducked his head down to place a heated kiss to Armin's lips, hands roaming lower and lower until they cupped the curve of Armin's ass -and it really was a nice ass-earning him a breathy sigh from Armin as he pulled away.

"Have you got any condoms?" Armin asked, his eyes fiery even in the dark of Erwin's bedroom.

"I have."

"Lube?"

"Uh..."

"No lube?"

Erwin shrugged sheepishly.

"It's been awhile."

Armin shook his head with what Erwin hoped was affection.

"It's fine, then. We'll do without."

Armin reached up on his tippy toes then, hands grasping Erwin's shoulder as he whispered hotly into his ear.

"Just be gentle with me, 'kay?"

Erwin chuckled darkly as Armin pressed a light kiss to his ear, wrapping his arms around Armin's waist and pulling the both of them down onto the bed in a tangled mess of limbs and arousal.

 

\---

It was later than Erwin would've normally slept in. He didn't need to look at his alarm clock to know that; the sunlight filtering in through his curtains was significantly brighter and warmer than it would be at his usual six a.m. wake-up call. He groaned, rubbing at his eyes with the heel of his palm as he turned his body to look at the bed's other occupant.

Armin still looked pretty deeply asleep. He was tangled in Erwin's comforter, clutching at one of his pillows and snoring softly, his mouth slack and his hair swept messily all across his face. Erwin smiled affectionately as he pushed his own hair out of his eyes. He wasn't quite sure what to do at that point, in the relatively unforgiving light of day. He had an admittedly limited experience with one night stands, and he had never been quite sure how to proceed with any of those, either. Perhaps he could start by making some coffee? Yeah, coffee sounded good, he thought as he swung his legs over the side of his bed, yawning his way over to the kitchen.

Setting up the coffee maker took only a few minutes, leaving Erwin more time for his morning contemplation (the time being, according to the timer on the coffee machine, eight in the a.m.). He hadn't really been looking forward to the party, a party where Levi knew more people than he did and he would be left to mingle aimlessly. He hadn't been counting on striking up a conversation that was actually fun, actually engaging. Erwin had almost forgotten how casual social interactions outside of polite conversation with his colleagues worked, and his circle of friends was, quite frankly, limited to the same people that had been in it for nearly a decade. It was nice, he supposed. Actually conversing with someone new.

The sex had been good too, of course. Erwin didn't think about that sort of thing often, due either to his limited time or his limited dating pool. It really had been a while since he had gotten any, longer than he cared to admit. Armin was...Erwin smiled at the memory of that noise he had made when he-

"Morning."

Erwin spun around to see Armin, clad in his rumpled clothes from the party and sleepily rubbing at his eyes, padding into his kitchen.

"Morning to you."

"Is that coffee I smell?"

"Sure is. Want any?" Erwin asked as the timer beeped off. Armin nodded, taking a seat as Erwin grabbed two mugs and filled the both of them up, joining Armin at his kitchen table.

"You live alone?" Armin asked as he sipped his coffee, glancing around the kitchen and adjacent living room. The house wasn't small, per se, but it was a bit more compact and simplistic than some of the surrounding homes. Erwin nodded.

"Probably wouldn't have....Ah, well...You know, with a roommate."

Armin smirked knowingly over his mug as Erwin shrugged a bit helplessly.

"Lucky you. Nice to have some...privacy."

Armin said it in a way that could have sounded perfectly innocent to just about anyone else. Thinking of some of the things he had done the night before (Things Erwin wasn't inclined to repeat...He didn't kiss and tell), it was definitely more salacious. He could've blushed.

"You have a roommate." Erwin said it more than asked it.

"Sure do."

"Do they know...why you didn't come home last night?"

"I texted him where I was." Armin smiled sweetly. "Remember?"

Erwin didn't, actually. Some details of the night before stood out to him more than others. He could take Armin's word for it.

"Although..." Armin hummed thoughtfully, eyes still observing the kitchen he was currently sitting in. "I probably shouldn't be too long. He doesn't like it when I get home terribly late the next day, you know."

That could have a lot of implications. Erwin narrowed his eyes at him across the table.

"Your...friend?"

"Yes, my friend." Armin responded simply, his smile not faltering one bit. "Anyways, I don't want to keep you from anything."

I'm not doing anything, Erwin almost responded. He swallowed the response down along with his coffee. Armin’s chosen method of exit was about as graceful as any, he supposed.

"I had a lot of fun last night." Armin said. Erwin prepared himself for Armin's inevitable departure (And it really was inevitable, he didn't know why he read so much into it). He had never been particularly emotionally invested in any of his few previous one night stands, no need to get heartsick over this one.

"I did too."

"And not just the sex. You're fun to talk to."

"Uh, thanks." Erwin couldn't help the little flush of blood that rose to his cheeks. He was genuinely pleased at the compliment. He had been sure Armin had enjoyed the sex as much as he had, after all. Armin made it quite obvious at the time.

"I do need to get going, though. My roommate's cool and all, but he is gonna give me some shit for staying out." Armin shrugged ruefully as he quickly sucked down the rest of his coffee.

"Hope I didn't get you into trouble."

Armin waved his hand dismissively as he checked his pockets for his phone and wallet, already heading towards his door. Erwin quickly stood up to walk him out.

"Don't worry about it. I'm an adult, anyways. What's he gonna do?"

Erwin nodded as he lead him over to the front door.

"Do you need a ride?"

"Nah, bus stop's right down the block. I need to go run an errand in town, anyways."

Armin stood perched in his door frame for a moment as Erwin waited for him to leave, unceremoniously and disappointingly hurriedly.

"If I..." Armin turned back to look at Erwin, worrying at his lower lip. "If I gave you my number, would you use it?"

"Um."

"Don't feel pressured or anything. Do whatever you feel like."

"I..." Erwin heaved a deep sigh. "I probably would, actually."

Armin beamed, bright as the sun currently streaming through his hair, and Erwin couldn't help but smile back.

 

\---

 

"You never did tell me where you ran off to."

Erwin looked up from his latte to where Levi was sitting opposite him, staring him down inscrutably while he sipped at his coffee. It's still early, a gray Monday morning, and the only other people in the coffee shop are the baristas and a college student desperately typing away at their laptop in the corner. Erwin enjoyed the early morning coffee runs he and Levi had made tradition for such Mondays, preparing for the work week ahead, but today he suspected the otherwise pleasant experience was going to turn into an interrogation.

"Look, I asked if your cousin could drive you back and you said yes, so-"

"That's not what I'm on about." Levi heaved a deep sigh as he sucked at his coffee again. Erwin felt like those cold gray eyes were staring into the very depths of his soul. It was definitely too early for this.

"I went home. Like I said."

"Sure you did."

"It's the truth." Erwin stated firmly, leaving no room for argument (Or so he hoped). Levi continued to stare him down, waiting for Erwin to crack. Waiting. Waiting.

"I mean, I may not have gone home alone-"

"I knew it!" Levi declared victoriously, startling a poor barista. "I knew it, you bastard. Ditching me to get your dick wet."

"Keep your voice down." Erwin grimaced. "And don't be crude."

"Please, there's no one here who even knows you. Or cares." Levi rolled his eyes. "I'm not here to judge you for your sex life. It's the first I'm hearing about you even having one."

"Ha, ha. I have sex, same as you. Presumably."

It was Levi’s turn to grimace.

"Fine. Don't really wanna hear about it, if that's alright with you."

"If you don't want to hear about it, why do you keep asking about it?"

"Don't get your old man panties into a twist. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't ask you who you had anonymous sex with for the first time in ages?"

"A friend that respects boundaries. And it wasn't completely anonymous. We did have, you know, a conversation."

"Before, during, or after?"

"Ugh. Shut up."

Levi chuckled into his coffee as Erwin glared at him, doing his best to seem intimidating. Levi didn't seem to care.

"But you didn't know them or anything. A one night stand."

"...Yes."

"You hesitated."

"I did not."

"Some little party animal isn't gonna go breaking your heart now, are they?"

"No." Erwin said in the firmest, most resolute voice he could find. "And that's the end of it.”

It evidently wasn't the end of it. Although Levi temporarily conceded as they threw their cups out and left the shop, as soon as they were out the door and onto the sidewalk, he continued his questioning.

"Can I at least get a description? Of the person, I mean."

"Guy. Young. Cute, blond, short. What do you want me to say?"

"You get his name, then?"

"Armin."

Levi immediately stopped in his tracks, though Erwin didn't even realize Levi was behind him until a few moments later. When he turned around, Levi looked to be a little disgusted and intently working something out in his head.

"What now, Levi?" Erwin said wearily.

"Armin? Armin Arlert?"

"I didn't get a last-Wait a minute." Erwin focused in on the conflicted expressions flashing across Levi's face, an enigmatic cloud of surprise, realization, and confusion. That wasn’t good.

"Oh my God, you know him, don't you."

"Not necessarily-"

"Oh my God. Oh no."

"Shut up, I've only met him a few times-"

"God dammit, who is he-”

"Pull yourself together, for God's sakes." Levi huffs in annoyance, running a hand through his hair as he continues to think things through.

"How, exactly, do you know him?"

"He's a friend of my cousin's."

"Mikasa?"

"You went home with him?"

"I'm assuming we're thinking of the same person, so yes."

Levi’s expression had cooled a bit, now more surprise than anything else as he contemplated his next question.

"You went all the way? Really?"

"Mind your own business. What do you mean, 'really,'?"

"Nothing, nothing..." Levi shook his head and waves Erwin off. "Really. Just...When I met him, he didn't seem like that type of guy." He added wryly.

"What 'type' of guy?" Erwin shot back, head still reeling at the fact that his casual bed-mate outside of his social circle might not be quite as out of his social circle as he had thought.

"Don't get defensive. Like, one-night-stand type of guy."

"...He did give me his number."

"Really?" Levi muses, quirking an eyebrow. "You gonna use it?"

"Maybe. Yes. I don't know."

"You liked him?"

Erwin paused, reflecting on the night of the party and how nice Armin's laugh had sounded.

"Yes. I suppose."

"You should. If you want to. Maybe. I won't tell you how to live your life."

With that, Levi continued to walk. Erwin smiled, despite himself.

“Don’t tell your cousin. That might get awkward.”

“Ugh, there’s no way in hell I’m telling her.”

 

\---

 

Erwin decided to wait a week to use the number Armin gave him.

_"Hey, its Erwin from the party-"_

_"It's Erwin. Remember me?"_

_"Sorry I took so long to text you. It's Erwin, by the way-"_

Erwin hastily deleted each one, huffing as he stared the keyboard, attempting to will it into showing him what he should type. After a minute of unsuccessfully attempting to divine an answer from his screen, he closed out of the chat screen and opened up his messages with Levi.

_"Levi what should I say"_

_"??" was the only response he got._

_"To Armin. From the party."_

_"What do you want from him"_

Erwin pondered that for a moment, and was unable to come up with a satisfactory answer.

_"A positive response. I don't know."_

_"You're stupid"_

_I know, Erwin thought, mulling it all over. What was it he wanted? A friend? A fuckbuddy? Something more? Somehow, none of those titles seemed quite right._

_"Ask him for coffee"_

_“How?"_

_"Idk. Ur a grown man, figure it out"_

Erwin sought no further wisdom, and Levi offered up none. He switched chats again, opening up the (blank) one he'd created with Armin's number.

_"Hey, it's Erwin. Sorry I took so long to text you, been busy. Did you maybe want to grab coffee sometime?"_

It worked about as well anything, he supposed. Erwin hit send before he psyched himself out of the chat once again, and waited with anticipation.

If Armin didn’t decide to respond, or answered in a way that was otherwise unfavorable, Erwin could face his rejection and be on his way (although he really hoped he wouldn't have to). After a minute of staring at his screen, willing a response to arrive, he decided a watched pot never boils and stood up, heading to his kitchen for a cup of tea.  
Ten minutes or so later, Erwin was sipping at his soothing chamomile when he revisited his phone, pleased but wary when the screen showed that he has a message. He speedily unlocked his phone to open up the chat.

_"U finally used my number! I was beginning to think u never would"_

Erwin couldn't help his smile as a warm feeling of relief washed over him.

_"I'm sorry"_

_"It's ok! When did u have in mind?"_

 

And so Erwin found himself waiting in his and Levi's usual spot on a rainy Thursday evening. It was cool outside: October had finally arrived, bringing with it the chilly, drizzly weather Erwin so disliked. He missed summer, with its long, sunny days and lazy warm nights. Cold weather only ever made him feel tired and gloomy.

The bell on the cafe's door rang softly, signifying the entrance of another patron. Erwin looked up to see Armin, shaking water from his hair as he stepped into the warm, dry comfort of the coffee shop. Erwin waved to him and Armin smiled as he caught his eye, stepping over to the window side table Erwin was sat at.

"Sorry I'm late. Seems like city buses are always late when the weather's like this." He apologized as he shrugged his jacket off, sliding into the seat across from Erwin. Erwin simply smiled and shook his head.

"It's fine, I've only been here a few minutes."

They both ordered their coffee, and Armin gazed out the window at the rain-slicked city.

"It's lovely out there."

"Haha."

"No, really."

"You like this sort of weather?" Erwin asked, eyebrow quirked.

"Yeah. Makes me want to curl up in a blanket and read." Armin smiled, a little wistfully, and Erwin imagined Armin wrapped up like a burrito reading whatever sort of book he was into. It made for a cute mental image.

"So," Erwin started, "How've you been?"

The conversation flowed easily between the two of them, taking turns sipping at their coffee, asking, answering, and listening. Erwin found out Armin had graduated from college about a year prior with a major in biomedical engineering and was currently doing a co-op at one of the largest companies in the city. Armin was interested to hear about the law firm Erwin himself was employed at, nodding along as Erwin expressed his interest in becoming a partner. Armin told him about his family’s pet cat, his recent trip to Mexico, and his failed attempts at getting his roommate to watch Orange is the New Black. Erwin told him about his unfortunate dog allergy, a summer trip to Scotland several years earlier, and asked Armin if he was caught up on the new episodes of Game of Thrones (He wasn't).

When their conversation lulled after nearly an hour of talking, and their coffee had run out, they simply sat there quietly, each enjoying the presence of the other. That was, until Armin received a text from someone he couldn't ignore, opening up his phone with pursed lips.

"Something important?"

"Nah," Armin said, typing out a response and putting his phone away. "Just my roommate."

"Mm. Eren, right?"

"Yeah-Hey, wait a minute." Armin stated at him, a little confused, a little suspicious. "How did you know that?"

"We have some...mutual friends, I suppose. I'm friends with the cousin of your friend who's friends with...Ah, I don't remember it all. I know Levi."

Armin cocked his head. "'Kasa's cousin? He's friends with Eren, too. They never mentioned you."

"Somehow I don't think he talks about me much."

Armin chuckled at that, shaking his head incredulously.

"You didn't know at the party, did you?"

"Nope. Complete coincidence."

"A happy one." Armin murmured thoughtfully. Erwin looked down to the table, where Armin's hand sat tantalizingly close to his.

"Did you..." Erwin licked his lips. "Did you want to come back to my place, by any chance?"

Armin smiled, sweetly yet apologetically.

"I had fun, and I do like you, but...not today. Sorry."

Erwin ruefully smiled back at him.

"That's fine."

"Maybe next time." Armin told him, a glimmer in his eyes as he stood up. Erwin walked him to the door, heart fluttering as Armin stood up on his tiptoes to press a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

There would be a next time.

 

\---

Next time ended up being the very next week, a different coffee shop (this time, one of Armin's choosing) and a leisurely stroll through the nearby park. The weather was much better than the week previous, the sky crisp, blue, and sunny. The leaves were just barely beginning to turn, the air pleasantly cool. Erwin nodded along as Armin chatted about his internship, and Armin listened in turn as Erwin told him about his own job, including his co-workers extremely unsubtle attempts to throw him a surprise party for his birthday.

"When's your birthday?"

"October 14th."

"Oh, you're a Libra? You don't seem like a Libra."

"Ugh, don't tell me you're one of those."

"One of whats?"

"People who think balls of gas millions of lightyears way affect our personalities."

"Don't be a downer, it's fun. You're sure?"

"I'll be what I like. I'm sure of what, my birthday? Yes, I'm sure."

"Just makin' sure." Armin chuckled into his latte as the pair strolled along. "I'm a Scorpio, myself."

"I don't really know what that means."

"It means I'm sexy and mysterious."

"Hm..." Erwin slowed to a halt, eyes roaming up and down Armin while he rubbed his chin in mock concentration. "Your horoscope lied."

"Hey!" Armin's face wrinkled up as he playfully smacked at Erwin's arm. "Libra horoscope this week says that you should stop being a butthead."

"Butthead? Nice retort, Armin." Erwin said dryly, raising an eyebrow. "Is that straight from your middle school days, ‘cause I know you're young, but-"

"Oh shut up. My roommate says it a lot, he rubs off on me."

"Your roommate Eren?"

"What other roommate would it be?" Armin looks down at the ground then, thinking something over for a moment. "You wanna come over to my place and meet him?"

Erwin wasn't entirely sure what to say at first, other than "I've already met him."

"At some party when he was either drunk or high. Or both." Armin says, unimpressed. "'Sides, I've already been 'round to your place. It's only fair."

Erwin turned the idea around in his head. There's no solid reason not to. Somehow, however, stepping into Armin's apartment seems like a violation of privacy and personal space (Even though, yes, Armin had been to Erwin's home, and they had even participated in certain illicit activities there). Erwin didn’t want to think about it, but he knew why: If he went to Armin's home, even just for a little while and in the presence of a third party, this little flirtation of theirs takes another step into unfamiliar territory.

"Why not."

 

\---

Armin lived on the second floor of a relatively new apartment building in the (dare he say) cooler side of town, and Erwin couldn't say he was familiar with the area. The interior of the building was clean, even if the elevator was currently out of order, and the only other resident Erwin spotted was a young woman determinedly jogging up and down the steps he and Armin were currently walking up.

"If he's still sleeping...I told him to set his alarm for three..." Armin muttered as he fumbled with his keys, unlocking a nondescript door and stepping into his apartment.

The apartment, or what Erwin could see of it, was a bit messy, piles of books stacked haphazardly on the kitchen table alongside empty mugs, rendering the table unusable. There were blankets strewn across a well-loved sofa, spilling onto the floor, and Erwin could see an empty wine bottle tucked under the coffee table. The place wasn't dirty, though, and it really wasn't anything a quick tidying up wouldn't fix. Armin seemed to realize this as he scooped up the dirty mugs and placed them none too gently into the kitchen sink. The faint scent of pine lingered in the air, and Erwin wondered if it was coming from one of the half a dozen candles sat atop the coffee table and bookshelf.

"Nice place."

"Thanks." Armin murmured as he shoved a stack of books to the corner of the table to clear a small bit of space. "Sorry, I know it's a little messy in here."

"Not at all," Erwin excused just as a door swung open and a bedraggled young man shuffled into the room. It was Eren, clad only in a sweatshirt and boxers, unshaven, hair sticking up in all sorts of odd places, stifling a yawn.

"Morning." He greeted sleepily, his voice husky.

"It's three-thirty." Armin deadpanned. "Did you just get up?"

"I didn't go to sleep until, like, five."

"That's still almost ten hours of sleep. Geez, Eren."

"Saving lives and shit is hard work. Really tuckers you out." He grumbled, pulling a chair out from the table and resting his chin on two thick textbooks. "Hello, Armin's friend."

"Erwin. We met at that party?"

"Yes. I do vaguely remember you."

"Nice to be vaguely remembered, I suppose."

"Have a seat," Armin told him as he shucked his jacket off and draped it over a chair. "I'm gonna make us some tea."

Armin busied himself in the little kitchenette, placing a kettle on the stove rifling through a cabinet. Eren, eyes tired but piercing, stared Erwin down.

"Nice to see you again. I guess." Erwin said after a few minutes, mulling over what to say next. "So...you and Armin?"

"Um." Erwin wasn't sure how to answer that. He wasn't entirely sure what the question was, either.

"Eren's an EMT." Armin said cheerfully as he sidled up in the chair next to Erwin. "He had a twelve hour night shift yesterday, if you want to know why he’s like this."

"That's brutal."

"Yeah." Eren nodded ruefully. "So, as I was asking-"

"Eren, don't be rude."

"I'm just making friendly conversation."

"You're making him uncomfortable."

"I'm fine." Erwin said, quite uncomfortable. Eren stared him down for another minute before giving up and heaving a sigh. "I'm too tired to give you the whole third degree, anyways." He stood up from the table as the kettle began to boil, grabbing three dirty mugs from the sink before Armin shot him a glare, shaking his head. Eren shrugged and pulled three (clean) mugs out of a cabinet.

"Just know if you guys hang out here a lot, I'm free to judge whatever gross shit you do."

"C'mon, Eren, I don't judge you for whatever weird things you and your boyfriend get up to."

"Not my boyfriend, 'Min."

"Right, sure."

Armin rolled his eyes with a little smile. Erwin was blushing ever-so-slightly, and wondered how often he would end up being back here. That brought up more unbidden thoughts and questions as to what exactly it was he and Armin had going on. Again, he pushed those thoughts away as Armin leaned in to whisper in his ear.

"I'm so glad you live alone."

Erwin smirked, and leaned back into Armin. "If you'd like, we could always head back there..."

Armin smiled mischievously, leaning away as Eren walked over with the three mugs of steaming hot tea.

"Tempting. But I've got stuff I've got to do later, so."

"Understandable."

"Whatcha guys talking about?" Eren asked, plopping down across from them. Armin shot him a look.

"Mind your own business."

"Your business is my business."

"Is not."

"Is too."  
The conversation soon devolved into a shoddy match of bickering which neither side seemed to be winning. Erwin couldn't say he wasn't entertained, at least.

 

\---

 

"Ugh, Erwin, I can't keep them straight."

"You can list off every character in Game of Thrones, their family, and how many people they'd slept with. I don't even want to hear it."

"That's easy, though! Everyone's names in this are stupid and sound the same."  
It wasn't a conventional date. It was Friday night, and Erwin and Armin made last-minute plans to grab some pizza (This sort of thing usually would have been followed by another walk in the park, but rain was pouring down mercilessly from the heavens). Armin, over the course of their conversation, mentioned briefly that he had never actually seen the cinematic masterpiece that was Lord of the Rings, to which Erwin had expressed both surprise and offence (He did not squawk in the middle of the restaurant, as Armin had teased him for). It really couldn't have ended up anywhere except on Erwin's couch, sipping at their beers and watching the screen intently.

"Anyways, I kinda like sci-fi more, anyways."

"Ugh, why?"

"It's cooler, I dunno. I was really into aliens and space travel and stuff like that as a kid."

"It's not cooler. I mean, do you see Ian McKellen kicking fire demon butt up there?!"

"I see 'im, I see 'im." Armin mumbled into his bottle. "You're still a nerd, though."

"Takes one to know one, Trekkie."

Armin glanced down at the Star Trek T-shirt he was, in fact, currently wearing, and scowled, but decided to return his attention to the movie in favor of bickering more and teasing Erwin for his crush on Ian McKellen. The man himself was now bellowing some powerful words of magic, and even Armin looked fairly impressed, flinching as the elderly wizard was thrown into the dark pits of the mines.

"Oh, no. C'mon, he was the best character! Erwin, he comes back, doesn't he? Erwin? Erwin?"

Erwin couldn't hold back his gleeful smile despite his best attempts at a poker face.

"I will neither confirm nor deny that."

"He does, doesn't he." Armin smirked triumphantly. "Okay, I guess I'll watch the second one now."

Now it was Erwin's turn to be triumphant. "One does not simply watch The Fellowship of the Ring and not then watch The Two Towers."

"Ugh, I can't believe you just referenced that old-ass meme. It's relevant, too, which is worse."

The two continued watching the epic fantasy adventure play out before them as the storm outside began picking up, a particularly large clap of thunder jolting Armin.

"Oh, that surprised me." Armin exclaimed as Erwin rubbed at his back. "Damn."

"Looks like you're not getting home in this weather."

"Ugh, definitely not. Anyways, I already texted Eren, so." Armin smiled deviously as Erwin's hand made itself comfortable resting on Armin's back. The two sat together like that until Armin sighed softly.

"This is, like, something old couples do."

Erwin didn't say anything. Armin studied his face for a moment, waiting for a response. Not offering one, Erwin decided to make do by lacing his fingers with Armin's. Armin squeezed his hand softly in acceptance.

"Isn't your birthday coming up?"

"...It's tomorrow."

"Oh. Yeah. Yeah, it is, isn't it."

"Mm-hm."

Armin turned again to look at Erwin's face. This time Erwin looked back. The glow from the television set lit Armin up perfectly, and Erwin was grateful for the warmth of Armin's body near his as another clap of thunder erupted from outside.

"You doing anything?"

"Just the bar with some friends. Might hang out with some people during the day, too."

"That's nice." Armin murmured, nodding his head.

"You could...come, if you wanted."

Armin looked a little surprised, and Erwin wondered if he had gone too far.

"I, uh...I wouldn't want to intrude. Thanks, though. Really."

Before Erwin could assure him it would be no intrusion, Armin continued.

"If you're not...doing anything afterwards, though...I would be happy to come over."

Erwin smiled softly.

"Two nights in a row?"

"Only if you wanted."

"I might."

Armin's sweet smile was enough to fill Erwin's chest with a blossoming warmth as he leaned into Erwin. Erwin wondered if Armin was going anywhere with that when Armin took the liberty of climbing into his lap and pressing a gentle but firm kiss to his lips.

"Let's go to bed." Armin whispered against Erwin's mouth as he pulled away.

"Movie's not done."

"It's a long movie. We can finish it tomorrow."

Erwin grinned and immediately rose, lifting Armin up by his waist and relishing the happy chuckle he gave as he carried him towards his bedroom.

 

\---

 

The next evening they went out was even cooler than the last, though significantly clearer, and Erwin was having feelings. Conflicted ones, particularly.

They had gone out again, for dinner, this time, at a nice little Italian joint, and Erwin spent half the meal laughing over the various misadventures with his friends and colleagues Armin shared and the other half wondering where this was all headed.

The whole business with Marie had ended spectacularly poorly, enough so that Erwin swore off dating for so long that he forgot what it felt like to be seeing somebody. He forgot what he was supposed to do. Armin, luckily enough, had made it pretty easy, but he still couldn't shake off the question festering in his mind.

"Armin?"

"Hm?"

"What are we, exactly?"

Armin seemed temporarily stunned by the question, blinking in confusion as his eyebrows furrowed up.

"I just...what do you want out of this?"

"What do you mean?" Armin ventured. "What do I 'want'? I wanna hang out with you more."

"Sure, but, in what way, exactly?"

Several moments passed as Armin thought his response over.

"I'm not really sure what you want me to say."

"I want you to say..." Erwin stopped, working out exactly what it was he was trying to articulate.

"With things like this, you have to know what it is. If that makes sense."

Armin's sigh in response was beginning to sound frustrated, his face wrinkling up in displeasure.

"I don’t know. I haven’t...I haven’t been with someone like this in awhile. Can't we just...I don't know, enjoy this for now?"

"That's something kids say."

"Oh, so I'm just some kid now?" Armin bit back. Erwin swallowed. No avoiding this now.

"I'm simply speaking from experience," Erwin retorted, "And things like this don't end well if both people don't know what they want."

"I like spending time with you. I like being with you." There was a touch of desperation in Armin's voice, only just a touch, overridden by frustration. "Why can't that be enough?"

"Because, unlike you, I have experience with relationships. I know what can happen."

"Where exactly do you get off telling me I have no 'experience'? You don't know me." The anger in Armin's voice was reaching a pitch now, less contained, rawer. Similar emotions were reaching a head in Erwin as well, as he similarly struggled to keep them down.

"Maybe I don't but that doesn't change anything. This can't just...go on if I don't know where this is headed."

"That's how relationships work."

"Not for me. I don't even know what this...'relationship' is."

"That's just-" Armin cut himself off with a frustrated groan, snapping away from Erwin and breathing in and out, heavily, before choosing his next words.

"Don't blame me for some bad breakup you had. It's not my fault you're a bitter, mistrustful old man who couldn't possibly be bothered to mess with a kid like me."

Ouch. That stung, hitting it's mark just about perfectly. Armin looked back to him, a cold glare that would terrify any lawyer Erwin knew fixed upon his face. His face wrinkled up into an angry grimace as he clutched the strap of his bag and turned on his heel to go, somewhere where Erwin wasn't, presumably.

"Where are you going, Armin."

"I'm gonna catch a bus. Not that it's any of your business."

As he strode angrily away, he paused, and, not even bothering to look back to Erwin, said his final, bitter remark.

"You know, if you'd wanted me to call you my boyfriend or whatever, you could've just asked."

And with that, he left in a whirl of physically tangible anger. Erwin could feel the anger rolling off his body in waves as well, until Armin was out of sight and his body relaxed where he hadn't even realized it had tensed up, and Erwin was suddenly aware of the chilly loneliness already settling deep within him.

Good job, he thought bitterly, Another thing you've gone and ruined.

As Erwin turned around to head for his own home, the opposite direction Armin had headed in, he did his best to shake thoughts of his past mistakes and current fuck-ups from his head. No such luck.

 

\---

 

It was one week later, and Erwin couldn't get Armin out of his head.

It was never going to be that easy, he thought to himself, idly scrolling through their past, brief convos on his phone. He should text him. He shouldn't. He should.  
Erwin's concerns were valid, weren't they? Didn't he have a right to know where this was headed? Maybe he did. He didn't want to think about that right now though. He didn’t want to dwell on the past and how it was currently affecting his present. Right now, he wanted to talk to Armin again.

It was late in the evening, and Erwin had just gotten out of the shower when his will finally snapped.

_"Do you still have my number?"_

Erwin waited with bated breath for what seemed like forever, staring at the lit up screen of his phone. After a few minutes, he could see that Armin had, in fact, read the message. It was another eternity until Armin finally responded.

_"of course i do"_

_"I'm-"_

Erwin thought out his response, trying to clear the cluttered thoughts from his head, if only momentarily. He needed to figure out what to say to Armin that would alleviate heavy weight of loneliness that had been hanging over him the past week.

Before he could even begin to work through what to say, Armin texted him back first.

_"im sorry"_

_That was unexpected. Probably undeserved, too. Erwin quickly typed out his response._

_"For what? I was the one acting an ass."_

_"no, you were right. you just wanted to know what it is we're doing. it's not unreasonable."_

Erwin heaved a sigh as he stared down at the message, thoughts only now just barely beginning to clear.

_"I could've been less condescending about it."_

_"yeah probably"_

_"still tho. i'm really sorry. you're not bitter. or old. that was unfair of me."_

_"You're not a dumb kid. And you were right. My past mistakes are no fault of yours."_

_"do you want to tell me? it's ok if u dont"_

Did he want to tell him? Something inside Erwin said he wasn't ready to fully open up about his disastrous past relationships quite yet.

_"Maybe another time. Let's just say I have some issues with ambiguity."_

_"im sorry. again. and i will call u my boyfriend if u rly want. i do rly like you"_

That text alone brought with it its own emotional issues (Was he ready to be somebody's boyfriend again? Anyways, the term sounded so...juvenile, not that he was about to tell that to Armin), but Erwin couldn't focus on anything else except the pleasant little fluttering in his chest.

_"Let's meet up again. We'll talk then. I miss you."_

_"i miss you, too"_

That text by itself was enough to have Erwin smiling like a lovesick fool as he lay in bed that whole night, waiting for sleep to overtake him, hopeful for the first time in a while.

 

\---

 

They really were doing this. If being invited to Armin's birthday dinner wasn't a big enough indication that this was headed somewhere, Erwin didn't know what was. Not that he was dwelling on it, especially after the previous week's incident. Levi had been invited to the dinner as well, either for Erwin's benefit or from virtue of being related to one of Armin's closest friends. Hanji was going too, though Erwin wasn't sure how that had happened: Levi had told him himself, so it was possible she was just going to be tagging along with them with the hope that Armin wouldn't mind terribly. Given the other increasingly unlikely overlaps between Erwin and Armin's friends, Erwin decided to simply not question it.

"This place looks dirty." Levi remarked as soon as they approached the Mexican restaurant the dinner was being held at.

"You say that about every place we go out to eat. You said that about the steakhouse we went to for Mike's birthday. And that one place Hanji invited us out to."

"Our friends need better taste in restaurants, then." Levi said as he swung open the door. "Or we need better taste in friends."

"Stop whining." Erwin waved to Armin, already sitting at a dining table with a decently sized group of people (He and Levi had arrived fashionably late due to some confusion over directions and a semi-dysfunctional GPS). He could see Eren sitting on one side of Armin and Mikasa on the other, listening intently as Hanji, sitting across from her, gesticulated wildly about something. The table's other three occupants, a young man and two young women, sat on the other end of the table, talking amongst themselves with Eren occasionally butting in.

"Hey, glad you made it." Armin smiled brightly as Erwin took a seat across from Armin that had been (conveniently) left open.

"So sorry we're late. We-"

"It's fine, it's fine." Armin waved him off. "We haven't even ordered yet."

"What's good here." Levi asked, either to Eren or Mikasa, Erwin wasn't quite sure.

"It's all good." Eren said around a mouthful of tortilla chips. "It's more about how much food you want to consume versus how much money you're willing to spend."

"I don't want a lot. I'm thinking maybe eating in moderation might be a good idea once in awhile."

"Ugh." Eren said. "Forget that. I wanna eat a burrito bigger than my face."

"Have fun with that."

Over the course of the evening, Erwin learned several things. One was that Hanji did in fact know Armin, or, rather, she knew Eren, the two of them working at the same hospital. Second, that besides knowing him through his cousin, Levi was further acquainted with Eren though his Ultimate Frisbee league, a sport Erwin knew Levi participated in but wouldn't have guessed Levi to invest so heavily in, at least where his friendships with his teammates was concerned.

The third wasn't so much something he learned as it was something observed. He got to see Armin drunk. Egged on by his other friends (Erwin had also learned their names to be Connie, Sasha, and Historia), Armin and several other occupants of their table consumed pale beer by the pitcher. Erwin hoped they all had designated drivers, because Eren and Connie were the only other people besides Levi and himself abstaining, and after a few hours, the table had devolved into a giggling, cheerful mess. It wasn't to the point where it was messy or downright downright irresponsible (Not yet, at least, Hanji and Miss Sasha both seemed well on their way), but it did bring back some fond, dated college memories.

The server cheerfully dropped off each person's respective receipts as tip money was stacked higher and higher atop the table, and Armin was thanking everyone for coming in between giggling at whatever it was Hanji was telling him, and Erwin tried to remember the last time he'd been around so many good-spirited (no pun intended), intoxicated people. The last party he had been to notwithstanding, even excursions out to bars or sports events Erwin usually found himself attending didn't end with such boozy mirth as was currently spread out around him.

Connie, Sasha, and Historia had already headed out the door, the rest of the group not far behind. Armin casually leaned into Erwin's arm as he finished telling some story to Mikasa, and Eren and Levi worked in tandem to get Hanji out of the restaurant and into her Uber with as little incident as possible. Armin was warm beside him in the cool, early November air, and Erwin was caught off guard when Armin suddenly decided to spin around and smack a sweet but messy kiss right on his lips. Levi chuckled as Eren gently pulled Armin away and towards his car, and Erwin couldn't do anything but smile like a dope as Armin promised to call him later. Eren managed to herd both Armin and Mikasa into the car, and Levi smirked suggestively at Erwin as they climbed into their own ride.

"Shut up." Erwin said, smile still plastered to his face.

"I didn't say anything."

 

\---

 

"Ugh, don't tell me Armin's trying to get you on that astrology bullshit."

"He is."

"No, I'm not!"

Erwin hesitated to call this a double date: It was a bit impromptu for that, Eren and Levi certainly weren't an item, and Levi wasn't even really supposed to be there. Armin and Erwin going out for some coffee had somehow turned into Armin, Erwin, and Eren going out for some coffee, which had then snowballed into Armin, Erwin, Eren, and Levi going out for coffee. Erwin wasn't entirely sure how it had happened, exactly, only that the four of them were now sat together around the coffee shop table teasing Armin for his little hobby.

"I just don't see how anyone, especially you, could think that stars literally millions-"

"Oh my God, Eren, I don't _literally_ think they control people's personalities, it's just fun-"

"You were so convinced that Hanji was a Leo, so don't even give me that."

"She just doesn't seem like a Virgo, Eren! Besides, guessing people's signs is fun!"

"And wholly inaccurate." Eren mumbled over his mug. Armin glared at him in mock anger.

"I guessed your boyfriend's sign correctly, didn't I? I just knew he was-"

"Okay, hold up, as I've stated before, he's not my boyfriend."

"Oh please, this again?"

"Of course he's not Eren's boyfriend." Levi interrupted. Armin looked exasperated. Erwin felt lost. Levi leaned in to whisper something in Armin's ear, something that caused Armin to laugh quite loudly and give Erwin his 'I'll-maybe-explain-later' face. Now it was Eren's turn to look exasperated.

"Hey, what'd he say? Levi, what did you say. Stop laughing. Don't try and change the subject from your stupid, pointless hobby, Armin."

Armin laughed again, this time reaching across the table to squeeze Erwin's hand, and Erwin felt contented, even if he didn't really know what was going on.

 

\---

 

“Do you really like him.”

The question caught Erwin off guard, to be sure, but he’d had years of training in the office in masking his instinctual reactions.

“What do you mean?”

From across the desk, half filling out paperwork, half regarding Erwin with a stony, searching gaze, Levi made a soft noise of noncommittal displeasure.

“You know exactly what I mean.”

“Sorry. I just don’t really see how it’s any of your business.” Erwin looked back to the paper he had been working over for the past ten minutes; It was getting late, and Levi’s questions were the last thing he wanted to deal with. He absentmindedly tapped his pen against the sheet in an attempt to focus as Levi huffed.

“Don’t be stupid, your business is my business.”

“Mm.” Erwin’s phone vibrated on the desk, and he glanced over to it. A text from Armin, asking Erwin what time worked best for him for their date Friday. Erwin reached for the device, typing out a response under Levi’s watchful eyes.

“Could you just answer me?”

“Why do you care so much?” Erwin stated emphatically. Levi seemed to consider his response for a few moments, as sure of what to say as Erwin was.

“Just making sure you’re okay.” He grumbled, returning to his papers. “You haven’t...Well, I know it’s been a while. Since, y’know.”

“I’m aware.”

“No need to get testy. Just making sure you’re okay.” Levi repeated. Erwin set his phone down and looked down at Levi, who Erwin thought had a very odd and stubbornly stoic way of showing he cared.

“Yes, I do like him. He likes me too, I think. Pretty sure.”

Levi quirked an eyebrow at him, but seemed to accept that answer, returning to his work as Erwin did.

 

\---

 

"Act casual." were the only two words Armin greeted him with as he opened the door to the Arlert-Jaeger apartment. Erwin didn't often visit Armin's place, making an exception today to help Armin assemble a miniature drawer, but, at Armin's mischievous tone, wondered what it was he had really gotten himself into. Erwin cocked an eyebrow, hoping his confusion would come across.

"Eren never invites Jean over." Armin said as if that would explain everything. "I’m about to pay him back for all the times he’s roasted me these past few months.”

"Okay..." Erwin mumbled as Armin led him into the apartment.

"I actually do need your help, though, and Eren and Jean aren't being useful at all, so."

"Sure. And who's Jean, again?"

"Hello."

Armin and Erwin turned into the living room where two young men were sat on a couch, overlooking a cluttered pile of IKEA-produced paraphernalia. One was Eren, boredly flicking through the channels on the television. The other must have been Jean, a tall, skinny man sporting a five o'clock shadow and tired looking eyes, tuning up a dusty guitar.

"Jean, Erwin. Erwin, Jean." Armin said cordially. Neither Eren nor Jean looked up from their respective tasks.

"So you're Armin's boyfriend."

Hearing the term caught Erwin a little off guard, but he nodded.

"And you're Eren's...not-boyfriend?"

Eren's looked away from the television long enough to shoot a withering glare at Erwin while Jean chuckled amusedly. Armin's smile was downright fiendish as he knelt down next to the skeleton of the drawer, scooting to make room for Erwin once he had hung his jacket up.

"He's my booty call." Eren said simply, finally deciding on some cooking show. "Jean, you're taking forever to tune that."

"It's really bad. When was the last time you played this?"

"I dunno. High school?"

"He tried to learn it 'cause he wanted to be like Billie Joe Armstrong. Wore eyeliner and everything." Armin commented as he handed Erwin the instructions.

"Aww~" Jean cooed.

"Shut up, the both of you." Eren scowled. "At least I didn't used to be a huge nerd, Armin. Oh, wait, you still are."

"Stunning rebuttal. Erwin, you find my nerdiness charming and sexy, don't you?"

"Sure."

"Ugh. You two are gross." Eren grumbled. "Armin, hurry up and get your shit outta my living room."

"You could help, Eren, Jean."

"I'm supervising." They both said in unison. Armin rolled his eyes and shook his head at Erwin as they resumed their task. The scene felt...domestic, idyllic, even with Eren and Jean bickering not five feet away and Armin's occasional snide comments towards them. Armin's brows furrowed in concentration as he attached two segments of the drawer, bangs falling into his eyes. Erwin fought every urge inside of him telling him to gently brush it away.

"That should do it." Jean said triumphantly, testing out a now in tune chord on the guitar just as Erwin finished turning in the final screw. He and Armin laced their fingers together as they admired their handiwork.

"Okay, then stop trying to make yourself look cooler than you are and actually play something." Eren said, turning away from the T.V. and into Jean as Armin and Erwin stood up to carry the drawer to Armin's bedroom.

"Any requests?"

"Something pretty."

Jean strummed experimentally while he thought, plucking a few notes out clumsily before setting into a comfortable rhythm of a familiar-sounding melody.

"Let's see, how does it go...Blackbird singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly..."

Erwin closed the door to Armin's room behind him, muffling Jean's admittedly pleasant voice. Armin's room was small and a little bare at first glance, with its white walls, carpet, and bedspread. Little bits of Armin shone through in the smallest details, however: The plant on the windowsill with Sharpie stars adorning its ceramic pot, the stack of math textbooks compensating for the too-short leg on his nightstand, the little mountain of notebooks, paperbacks, and old comic editions littering his desk. Everything in there was just so Armin, down to the fresh, piney smell.

Armin rested the complete drawer against his wall, mumbling something about moving it later, and sat down on his bed, pushing a fluffy blue pillow aside for Erwin to sit beside him. As Erwin seated himself, Armin placed a hand on his cheek, and he turned his face to accept a soft, lazy kiss from Armin.

"Think we could have some fun?" Armin murmured into his mouth. Erwin's eyes glanced towards the door.

"Better not risk it."

Armin smirked, pulling both of his legs up onto the bed to straddle him, deepening the kiss as he pushed Erwin back onto the bed. Erwin let himself fall back, hand reaching up to tangle in Armin's hair and eyes fluttering shut.

 

\---

 

It couldn't have been avoided: Armin had been given a week-long reprieve from his work for Thanksgiving, leading him to promptly load up his car and make a nearly ten-hour long trek into the depths of northern Michigan. It would've been nice to spend the day with Armin; Erwin had virtually no relations left to spend the holiday with, and as it was he was likely to just go to work, leave early, and spend the rest of the day half-watching the football game and maybe catching up on some reading. It wasn't a bad way to spend the day at all, at least not by his estimation, but it was a little tiring watching his friends go home to their families and regard him with not-so-subtle pity. Now, he didn't even have Armin to relieve the dull pang of loneliness, at least until later in the evening when Armin had set some time aside to Skype him.

"-Ugh, and it gets so cold up here. I know I grew up here, but like, geez. It’s almost enough to make you forget about climate change. Almost."  
Armin's face was a little grainy in-call, either from a poor connection, poor webcam, or both. Erwin could see he was bundled up in one of his too-big university sweatshirts, the hood pulled up and pushing blond hair into his face. The room he was sitting in was a little harder to see, basically just a blur of chilly blue pixels, but he could make out the small bed Armin was sitting on and what looked like a Spice Girls poster pasted to the wall behind him. Very, very faintly, he heard something sounding like music in the background

Erwin cocked his head. “What’s that I’m hearing?”

Armin listened for a moment to the guitar riff playing throughout the house before rolling his eyes.

“Ugh. I love my parents, but they still listen to Bon Jovi.”

“Oh, how awful.”

“I know, right? I’m glad I didn’t inherit my taste in music from them, although I apparently didn’t inherit their cold tolerance, either.” Armin added, shivering and pulling his sweatshirt tighter around him. “How did I grow up here? They only just turned their heat on. I’m gonna die.”

“It’s ‘cause you have no body fat.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. I wish you were here.” Armin mumbled, a little wistfully.

“To keep you warm?” Erwin asked, a wry smirk making its way across his features. Armin rolled his eyes in response.

“No. Well, maybe a little. I don't know, I feel bad leaving you all alone over there.”

“Don't.” Erwin quickly assured him. “I'm fine. Promise.”

Armin looked like he didn't fully believe him, but he let the matter drop either way.

“Erwin, I don’t want to sound corny, but-”

“Too late, but go on.”

Armin gave him a look of mock reproach before smiling gently again.

“I’m glad I met you. That’s what I’m thankful for this year. Among other things.”

Erwin found himself smiling warmly back at the boy on his computer screen.

“Guess I'm glad I met you, too.”

 

\---

 

Erwin awoke sometime around four in the morning to a light snow gently falling outside and Armin just beginning to stir lightly by his side. Erwin tiredly rubbed at his eyes as he sat up, glancing out the window to where the streetlights were still on, then back to Armin. He couldn't help but admire the view, Armin, naked and peaceful, nuzzling his face to where Erwin had just moments ago been lying asleep. More and more, Armin ended up spending the night with him whenever they went out on their little dates or whatnot. Erwin couldn’t say he minded. Armin sighed deeply, a single eye fluttering open.

"...Erwin?" He murmured sleepily. Erwin smiled affectionately and lay back again, pulling Armin close to him so that his head lay resting against Erwin's chest, right where he liked it. Armin hummed contentedly as he resituated himself.

"Go back to sleep." Erwin said gently, even as Armin was already beginning to doze off again. Armin's gentle breathing was enough to quickly lull him back to sleep, as well.

 

\---

 

“Days are gettin’ colder.” Armin mumbled around his Starbucks drink, fiddling with a fallen bishop as he stared intently at the board lay out before him, as though he could divine a winning play from looking hard enough. Armin had thus far in the game boxed himself into a corner, his king looking quite precarious as Erwin’s pieces began encroaching towards it, but Erwin couldn’t afford to let his guard down at this stage in the game. Armin had a way of subverting him, and even if he wasn’t as experienced or skilled a player as Erwin, he’d managed before to use some creative plays to beat Erwin on occasion.

“That does tend to happen in the winter.”

“I hate the cold.” Armin said, sipping at whatever sugary drink he had purchased before stopping by Erwin’s and finally deciding on his move. It was a poor move, but Erwin supposed Armin had already ceded the game, looking towards the next one where he would assimilate Erwin’s strategies and use them against him. The score currently was 7-4, favoring Erwin, not that he was keeping track or anything, but Armin’s victories were occurring more and more frequently. For someone who claimed to have little patience for the game, he was certainly a fast learner.

“I know.” Erwin responded, taking Armin’s king mercilessly with a twinge of pride. Armin didn’t seem to care, though Erwin could see he was carefully examining the pieces remaining, storing the board’s set-up in his mind for later. “You should buy a warmer coat.”

“I have one. It’s too big; More like a sleeping bag than a coat, really.”

“Mm. Don’t complain, then.”

“You’re mean.” Armin was smirking at him over the top of his holiday cup as he set about putting the pieces away. “I’m going to beat you next time.” He added, gesturing to the board.

“I look forward to it.” Erwin teased, not doubting it at all, closing the board up as Armin lightly kicked at his leg. Armin’s feet had a habit of wandering during their games, ‘accidentally’ rubbing against his leg with just enough light pressure as Erwin tried to focus on his turn. Armin was a rotten cheater.

“Are you going to stay for dinner?” Erwin asked as he stood to place the board in its resting spot atop his bookshelf. Armin looked contemplative when he turned around for an answer, head resting in his palm and eyes carefully studying Erwin.

“Am I allowed?”

“Don’t be silly, of course you’re allowed.” Erwin snorted.

“Feels like I’m here more than the apartment. Eren’s gonna get lonely.”

“Mm. Sounds like an ‘Eren’ problem and not an ‘us’ problem, if you ask me.”

“An ‘us’ problem, you say, hm?” Armin hummed, his smirk growing as Erwin sat down beside him and draped an arm over his shoulders, more out of habit than anything else.

“And you’re welcome here whenever you want. You know that?”

“Whenever…” Armin purred, reaching behind him to take Erwin’s hand in his. “Dinner sounds good. I do like you, Erwin Smith.”

 

\---

 

It was going to be Christmas Day in about fifteen minutes, and as much as Erwin always has fun at Hanji’s annual Christmas Eve party, he needed to get out. There’s something he needed to tell Armin.

“Don’t forget your gift, Erwin!” Hanji called from the kitchen as he buttoned up his coat in the hall.

“I’ve got it, Merry Christmas!” Erwin called back, though he doubted she could hear him over the din of the other guests and the novelty Christmas music playing through the house. Armin, standing next to him, smiled and shook his head as he tugged on a scarf.

“Thanks for bringing me along.” Armin said as Erwin swung the door open and they stepped out into the chilly night air. “I had a lot of fun. It’s...actually been awhile since i went somewhere for Christmas Eve, believe it or not.”

“I’m glad. It’s been awhile since I, ah, had someone to bring to one of these.”

“Mm.” Armin hummed, shutting the door behind him as Erwin tucked the modestly sized package Hanji had given him under his arm. It’s a clear night, with as many stars visible as can be allowed with the city’s light pollution, and it’s not terribly cold, either. Armin looks pretty, Erwin thought as he turned to look at his companion. His face was aglow in the light of the streetlamps, and the neon from the 7-11 across the street cast seasonally-appropriate red and green streaks across his hair.

“It’s too bad there’s no actual mistletoe here.” Erwin said, glancing up at Hanji’s doorframe.

“I’ve never actually seen mistletoe hanging in someone’s house. It’s something that everyone associates with Christmas but never actually buys, I guess.”

“Isn’t it a parasite? Like, in nature?”

“Something like that.” Armin responded with a grin. They’d only just left the warmth of Hanji’s home, but already Armin’s cheeks were rosy from the cold air. Erwin reached his hand up, almost absentmindedly, to cup the side of Armin’s face and tilt it up to look at him for a moment. His cheek was as cold as it looked against his hand, but his lips felt warm when Erwin ducked his head down to kiss him. Armin happily acquiesced, placing a hand on Erwin’s waist and smiling into the kiss. Erwin kissed him maybe a little longer than he should, given that they’re still standing in his friend’s driveway, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. When he did decide to pull away, he exhaled quickly, his pulse racing ever so slightly

“I think I might love you.”

A pause.

“You think? Or you do?”

“I do.” Another pause. “Yeah, I think I do.”

Armin took this new information in for a few unsure, terrifying moments before reaching up to kiss Erwin again. The kiss is gentle and impossibly sweet, but has an unmistakable need behind it as one of Armin’s hands reached up to gently tangle in Erwin’s hair.

“This is the part in the movie where snow is supposed to start falling really romantically.” Armin whispered as he pulled away.

“Climate change,” Is all Erwin could mumble as Armin smiled up at him, brushing a stray lock of hair from Erwin’s eyes. His expression was soft and tender as one of his hands reached to grasp Erwin’s.

“As it happens, I love you, too. I think.”

“You mean it?”

Armin’s face lit up and really, Erwin should be used to this, but his stomach still flopped at the happy sight of it.

“Hell yeah.”

The two gazed at each other for another moment as disbelief at his own luck and joy at the young man in front of him fired off inside of Erwin like fireworks. Remembering himself, Armin tugged at Erwin’s hand and began to turn away.

“C’mon, loverboy, let’s get outta here.”

With that, Armin began to walk from the soft glow of Hanji’s home and towards the car sitting in the street and, hands still intertwined, Erwin followed happily.

**Author's Note:**

> well there you go
> 
> it's been like a really really long time since i've written fanfiction (long time since i've written anything for fun, actually) but this was really enjoyable to work on. thanks for reading the entirety of this monstrosity. i think i proofread this well enough that it won't just...switch tenses...in the middle of a section...because i do that...but tell me if you notice something's gone awry.
> 
> i didn't have a plan writing this, and i'm sure it's obvious. i really just wanted to write about some nerds falling in love. yes, i really did just plagiarise most of this from my life, i swear to god if someone i know somehow finds this you better not fucking bring it up irl i swear i will stick a fork in your eye. 
> 
> you may now throw rotten vegetables at me as you wish. holler though if you somehow liked it or want to read anything else in the future...either smut because you're all terrible or something an actual plot. i love you. have a happy holiday season.


End file.
